Eating contests. Because that makes sense.

Why do eating contests exist? Why don’t we move eating contests to Somalia. (This is off topic, but that fat guy that used to be in the commercials with all the poor, skinny, hungry children asking for donations) like, he was fat & had no right being there. I hope he fed them. Feeling hungry is annoying.

Can you imagine eating over 100 chicken wings? Would you ever want to eat ONE again after that? & who can eat more than 2 hot dogs? People are either dying, getting very ill, being rushed to the hospital for AN EATING CONTEST. With your help, donate now & we can stop this. Hi. I’m Gerri Sanderson, with your help we can stop people from eating too much for money that they will never get to spend because they will die after eating 56 donuts. I want gastroparesis!

There should not be a curry eating competition ever. How did we go from eating pie to spicy, curry chili! People actually train for this type of thing. “Hey, honey, what are you doing tonite? Wanna get dinner? No, hun I gotta do my training, you know I gotta do it babe, for the team. The next contest doesn’t allow chipmunking.” Take a look at a few of these:

‘Killer’ curry eating competition lands two contestants in hospital after downing ‘hottest chili’

You know you always wanted to eat cockroaches!! Let’s see how many you can eat!

When Joey Chestnut won the hot dog eating contest.

The famous Black Widow and her Buffalo chicken wings.

But when you don’t win…………..doesn’t that suck???!!!!!!!!! Why bother? Was it worth it jeopardizing your health for THAT? Gaining a few pounds? Passing out? Throwing up (my personal favorite)? Can you imagine? “Oh man, I didn’t win. Shooooot.”

When I’m eating normally, I soak my food in whiskey, that way it goes down much easier. You learn something new everyday.


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